The journey is the best part. It started with a man who wanted someone so badly that he hid his identity just to get a shot at love. She fought the idea of making her business partner her lover, but in the end love and passion won out over sensibility. When everything crumbled, there was only one man left standing. Will he get his happily ever after?
Here's a Tuesday teaser
I walked out of attorney’s office with K.K. by my side. I couldn’t help but stare at her as we walked back to the office. Her emotions were all over the place and so were mine. We were like two fault lines below the surface, serene at one moment and the next threatening complete destruction. I wanted to hug her and hit her at the same time. Kiss her and slap her senseless for being so careless with my heart. I wanted to slip the enormous diamond enclosed in the black velvet box, under my arm, onto her finger and drag her to the altar. But, everything was so fucked up. How could I love her so much and hold her in such contempt? It was tormenting to even be near her, but I was so scared to let her go. Was her love for me so fleeting and insignificant that she’d pick right up with someone else? Jake? Dr. Nichols?
“I’m sorry about what I said at the office,” I said, looking at the sidewalk in front of me. I couldn’t stomach seeing to see the hurt in her eyes, raw and unrelenting. “The sight of you doesn’t make me physically ill. And, while I may not respect some of your recent choices, I do respect you as a person.”
“If it helps, Josh. The sight of me make me physically ill and my choices have been flagrant and deplorable. You don’t have to apologize. I’ve earned your hatred.”
I stopped dead in my tracks and after realizing I’d stopped, she did as well. She turned and looked at me, her lip tucked in between her teeth. She looked almost childlike in her stance, all confidence gone. I wanted to shake the shit out of her. One minute she hears everything, the next its dead space. “I don’t hate you.” She didn’t reply. She just turned and kept walking. I ran up behind her and twisted her around by her arm. “I don’t hate you!”
“It’s fine!” she said, her voice cracking from the emotional strain of my words. She was trying to pull away but I wouldn’t let her go. I didn’t want to let her go…ever.
“No! It’s not fine! It’s far from fucking fine.”
“Joshua, stop. I’m begging you,” she pleaded for me to stop, but I didn’t want her to think that I’d gone from love to hate. I knew the things I’d said had cut her harshly. I was drunk and hurt last night. I couldn’t use that excuse today. But for me to tell her she was just like her mother was a low blow. She needed to know that I still loved her. That I always would. I still wanted her to be mine. I didn’t know how to win her back, but I wasn’t done fighting for her…for us. “You said you weren’t asking for a lifetime from me anymore. I get it. I can’t take anymore. Can’t you see how much I’m hurting? I just need to try to maintain some semblance of myself. My sanity is in question. My heart is sitting at the bottom of my feet in a million pieces and I need to get back a five million dollar car and the same amount in shares that rightfully belong to both of us. I don’t have it in me to fix you too right now.”
I didn’t have words to express how sad I was. For me. For her. For everything that had been done or said. I had a fiancée yesterday morning and today I had nothing. I tugged her frail body into my chest and locked my arms around her. “I’m so in love with you. I’d do anything to fix this. I never meant to hurt you.”
She didn’t say anything she just wept and so did I. Our scheduled conversation was probably pointless. We’d just said it all. We were both broken beyond repair. Love just wasn’t enough to right the wrongs. I pulled her back to look at her damp face and bloodshot eyes. She smoothed away the tears from my cheeks and I did the same for her. “I love you, K.K.”
“I love you too,” she finally conceded.
It wasn’t everything, but for right now, her words were enough to stop the bleeding.
June 15, 2015
It's hard to believe the MERGER Series has come to and end. But it's onward and upward. I will release the boxed set in July. You'll be able to get all three books as one bundle. Next up it's PRESCRIPTION FOR LOVE. I've posted an excerpt in a previous blog (check it out). I started writing it for NANO and it already has about 35K in words, so it's already got a good start. I haven't looked at it in awhile, but know you'll be happy with the end results. It's the book I will be pitching to agents and editors at this years Romance Writers Conference which is in mid-July in New York City. I am looking forward to catching up with my author friends from all over the country and Canada too. It's an amazing conference and I always come back with a wealth of knowledge.
Here's what I'm listening to today: Caroline - By Alex Clare
Please review my books on Goodreads and Amazon. Your opinion matters. Happy reading my friends. Stay tuned in and turned on!
Heather M. Miles